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Political Joke Thread

#1 User is offline   Senexx 

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Posted 14 January 2011 - 03:16 PM

The politician was sitting at his campaign headquarters when the phone
rang. He listened intently, and after a moment his face brightened. When
he hung up, he immediately phoned his mother to tell her the good
news. "Ma," he shouted, "the results are in. I won the election!"

"Honestly?"

The politician's smiled faded. "Aw jeez, ma, why bring that up at a time
like this?"
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#2 User is offline   Epicurus 

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Posted 22 January 2011 - 05:36 PM

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#3 User is offline   Warrigal 

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 04:53 PM

I know a political joke.

Tony Abbott

(BoomBoom!)

Paroxysms of laughter cripple the Wired who fall about chuckling and giggling until they have to be assisted from their keyboards, their eyes wild with mirth.

Tony Abbott! get it? Geez that's funny. Tony Abbott; of course you get it!
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#4 User is offline   JJ 

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Posted 03 February 2011 - 10:55 PM

View PostWarrigal, on 03 February 2011 - 04:53 PM, said:

I know a political joke.

Tony Abbott


:emot-downsrim:

I've been waiting to use that one :P

Also, that currency battle vid made me :emot-roflolmao:
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#5 User is offline   Kuzushisan 

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Posted 04 February 2011 - 07:29 AM

"Their not enemies, they are frenemies" Bwahhahahahahahahahahha... That's gold, pure gold...
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#6 User is offline   Senexx 

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Posted 19 February 2011 - 03:15 PM

Posted Image

Source: Herald Sun
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#7 User is offline   HDMC 

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Posted 20 February 2011 - 06:23 AM

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#8 User is offline   Epicurus 

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Posted 27 February 2011 - 01:03 AM

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#9 User is offline   Senexx 

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Posted 27 February 2011 - 08:26 AM

I'm just glad that's in the Joke Thread Epi, I'd hate to have to post the reply to it (which didn't go viral like the one above) that explains how Quantitative Easing truly works. Yes the one above is wrong.
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#10 User is offline   Epicurus 

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Posted 28 February 2011 - 05:50 PM

View PostSenexx, on 27 February 2011 - 08:26 AM, said:

I'm just glad that's in the Joke Thread Epi, I'd hate to have to post the reply to it (which didn't go viral like the one above) that explains how Quantitative Easing truly works. Yes the one above is wrong.



:emot-v:
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#11 User is offline   Senexx 

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Posted 28 February 2011 - 06:15 PM

don't think I've seen this one - LOL
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#12 User is offline   Senexx 

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Posted 01 March 2011 - 04:38 PM

A unionized public employee, a member of the Tea Party, and a CEO are sitting at a table. In the middle of the table there is a plate with a dozen cookies on it. The CEO reaches across, takes 11 cookies, looks at the tea partier, and says, "Look out for that union guy, he wants a piece of your cookie."

Source
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#13 User is offline   icey 

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Posted 11 April 2011 - 11:13 AM

Posted Image


Choc tops, popcorn, carbon tax?

Oh yes please! Give me that carbon tax, and give me a big serve.
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#14 User is offline   Marat 

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Posted 13 April 2011 - 10:44 AM

View Posticey, on 11 April 2011 - 11:13 AM, said:

Posted Image


Choc tops, popcorn, carbon tax?

Oh yes please! Give me that carbon tax, and give me a big serve.

Do you want compensation with that?
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#15 User is offline   icey 

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Posted 13 April 2011 - 10:25 PM

View PostMarat, on 13 April 2011 - 10:44 AM, said:

Do you want compensation with that?


Oh! Yes please. Compensation for all.

That would be sweet. Mostly no one (certainly no taxpayers) will have to pay anything for the carbon dioxide taxing folly, and we all get to feel good later.

I feel better now.
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#16 User is offline   icey 

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Posted 16 April 2011 - 04:01 PM

View Posticey, on 13 April 2011 - 10:25 PM, said:

Oh! Yes please. Compensation for all.

That would be sweet. Mostly no one (certainly no taxpayers) will have to pay anything for the carbon dioxide taxing folly, and we all get to feel good later.


marat said:

Do you want compensation with that?


The compensation cup didst not runneth over.

Verily, verily I say that the provision of a feast for the multitudes was nary but an illusion to be embraced by the rank and file, and by the hordes gathering at the gate.
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#17 User is offline   scotto 

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Posted 09 May 2011 - 11:29 AM

The best political joke of recent times has surely got to be Obama paying out on the 'birthers' and Trump in particular with his Lion King stunt at the recent press corps dinner in Washington. Footage of Trump sitting at his table, staring ahead with rage was priceless.
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#18 User is offline   AlexSchlotzer 

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Posted 04 June 2011 - 01:28 PM

Here's my small contribution

A stockman from North Queensland attends a social function where Tony Abbott is speechifying. Clearly the stockman was not paying much attention, yakking with those closest and even quite faraway. Tony endeavoured to attract his interest with slower, single syllable, words.

As he was doing that, he kept swatting at some flies that were buzzing around his head.

The stockman says, "Yer havin' some problem with them circleflies?"

Tony stopped talking and said, "Well, yes, if that's what they're called, but I've never heard of circle flies."

"Well Sir," the stockman replies, "Circle flies hang around these parts a lot. They're called circle flies because they're almost always found circling around the back end of a horse."

"Oh," Tony replies and resumes rambling. But, a moment later he stops and bluntly asks, "Are you calling me a horse's arse?"

"No, Sir," the stockman replies,"I have too much respect for the citizens of this country to call you a horse's arse?????Tony."

"Thank you for that respectful explanation," Tony responds and resumes rambling once more.

And the stockman adds slowly ...

"Hard to fool them flies, though."
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----
Alex Schlotzer
Visit my Blog about politics, online activism and social media.
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#19 User is offline   scotto 

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Posted 17 June 2011 - 01:14 PM

There was John Button's fearless assessment of Bob Hawke: "He was a man who cold stand back and take a good look at himself, and like what he saw."
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#20 User is offline   Epicurus 

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Posted 13 November 2011 - 03:57 AM

changed my mind.
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